Atomic Habits by James Clear
EPISODE SUMMARY
In this podcast episode, I discusses my insights from reading "Atomic Habits" by James Clear. I highlight the importance of building and sustaining good habits, and how small changes can lead to significant progress over time. I also discuss the influence of social media on our perception of success, the non-linear nature of habits, and the importance of having a specific plan when establishing new habits. This book definitely helped me reframe my expectations about building sustainable habits and how to define success in this regard.
Listen on your favorite podcast listening platform like Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and Amazon Music.
About The Letters & Layers Podcast
The Letters and Podcast is hosted by Amaka Gratia, a Yale-educated Mental Health Nurse Practitioner who talks about books she loves and is currently reading, takeaway lessons, and topics focused on therapy and mental health that resonate with Black women today.
TRANSCRIPT
Amaka (00:00:14) - Hey y'all. Welcome back. Welcome back to the podcast. It's your host, Amaka. How's it been going with me? I can give a little bit of an update at the time of this recording. I am in Philadelphia. So. I lived here, um, some years back, maybe about five years ago now. It was for a short time. If you have listened to my journey to being an MP episode, you know, the whole spiel. I was here for about a year. Um, and even though my time here was cut short, I really connected with the city. I love its vibe. I love just how it moves. And, um, I just feel like its energy is really compatible with me as a personality. If I can, like, personify it. If I could personify a city, I feel like me and Philly would be BFFs. I just love it. It's it's beautiful. It's beautiful in the fall time. It's like old town architecture in, like places like West Philly are beautiful and great food.
Amaka (00:01:39) - A lot to do. Um, and I always feel good. I always feel good when I'm here. So I decided to come down for a weekend. Um, I have some friends here, so after this recording, I'm actually going to go meet them for brunch. Um, but also to having moved to New York and getting settled, but still kind of getting my bearings. I really have not nailed down a space or, um, a schedule for my podcast recordings. And, you know, they used to be easier. When I lived in Connecticut, I would typically record on Sunday mornings. I had my space, my desk, looking at my window. You guys know the whole spiel. That's not the case anymore. So I'm kind of in flux with that. And, um, I don't want to stop recording, obviously. So I'm kind of just recording when I can and sometimes recording more than one episode at a time, because I really don't want to have, you know, a podcast day be skipped.
Amaka (00:02:52) - So, um, I'm here, I'm in Philly along with meeting friends. I've done some podcasts, behind the scenes work. Um, I've recorded a couple of other episodes along with this one. Um, so I'm feeling really productive. Um, I'm feeling really inspired and motivated, and I feel like regardless of the environment that I'm in, um, I have kind of made this into a habit, which, no pun intended with the title of this episode, but I think it's a good segue. So we're actually talking about the book Atomic Habits on this episode. Um, by James Clear. Very happy to be getting back to the books, although I think the episodes that I have put out in the past, like month or so, have been, um, timely and important for me. And I hope that listeners out there got something from it. But a big part of this podcast is talking about books that I'm loving, regardless of genre. Oftentimes they have like a therapeutic component and things that you can learn and you can use to improve your everyday life.
Amaka (00:04:13) - So with that said, let's dive in. So yes, atomic habits, um, an easy and proven way to build good habits and break bad ones by James Clear. I started this book around New Year time and you know, was reading it and was getting a lot of gems from it that I think I'm going to kind of implement in my daily life. And keep in mind when things get tough, because habits are hard. Starting a habit is hard. Building up momentum is hard. Keeping it up is hard. Keeping you up for a very long time is hard. You know, continuing a habit despite not seeing immediate results right away. It's hard. And I think that this book kind of helped me. Reframe my perspective when it comes to how to and when to expect results with habits. You know, there's so much out there that tries to help folks with being able to start habits and sustain them. Um, and they're all well intentioned and. Are meant to help, but I think with this book I liked a couple of things.
Amaka (00:05:52) - One thing I liked was that in terms of themes in the book, which is what I'm going to focus on more so in this episode, less about the technicals, which I think is a reason why, if you are looking for support in starting habits or sustaining habits and your reader or you want to listen to a book via audio, I would recommend this book. Um, when it comes to starting and sustaining habits, um, the themes in this book were particularly helpful to me and stuck with me the most. The technical and practical um suggestions in this book are also helpful to. But like I said, going to talk more about the themes because. That's what resonated with me the most. And I think in moments where I don't want to get up and work out or I am not really feeling like recording or, um, you know, not really feeling like reading, I'm going to remember these themes and I'm going to. Use that as support for continuing to keep going. Because just because you like to do something doesn't mean that it's still not hard.
Amaka (00:07:17) - You know, I love recording this podcast, but it doesn't mean that it doesn't get hard. Sometimes I love to read, but sometimes I don't feel like doing it. Um, I don't know if I would say I love to work out, but I know it's good for me and there are some forms of working out that I actually really enjoy. Um, but that doesn't mean that I don't feel like doing it sometimes, you know? And everyone has that struggle. You can love something, but you just don't feel like doing it. So I'm going to touch on what hit me the hardest with this book. I'm going to read some excerpts, and I hope that whatever I speak about, um, even if you take one thing that's amazing. Um, so one theme in this book, when it came to habits and expectations of habits, was time. Time came up throughout this book. And when I talk about time, I mean what we expect. Time wise when it comes to expecting results.
Amaka (00:08:26) - With habits, we start a habit. But oftentimes we are misinformed about how long it's going to take to see results. And that can really discourage us continuing on. And we oftentimes, I think, dismiss the changes that can happen with the tiniest. Shifts in a positive direction. We think that, oh, you know, just reading one page in a book is not a big deal. Just doing ten squats a day in the morning won't really change anything. Um, you know, things like that. Just practicing an instrument for five minutes a day is not really going to bring about any change. But one thing that the book. Stressed is that these little changes that. We if we commit to them over time. Compound. And one day you wake up and you find that you can read however many pages, 50 pages in 30 minutes. Why? Because the habit has been cultivated. Or you find that it's not even really a big deal to work out for an hour, or practice an instrument for half an hour, or things like that.
Amaka (00:10:07) - Small changes, no matter how little. Are significant. They're important as long as they are continuing to steer you in the direction of the identity that you want to espouse. Then you're doing the right thing. And that's another thing that he talked about in the book. It's less about. Trying to adopt an action and more about trying to be that identity. So instead of saying. I'm trying to run more. You tell yourself I'm a runner. Instead of saying to yourself, I'm trying to write more, you say I'm a writer. Instead of saying I'm trying to read a little bit more every day. You say I'm a reader sometimes just kind of making those affirmative statements. For yourself, will support you and will push you to actually perform those habits. And with every choice that you make that confirms that identity. It becomes you more and more every day. And our perspective when it comes to how to expect or when to expect results when it comes to habits, can be skewed. And I think it's not the only reason why, but I think social media has a lot to do with it.
Amaka (00:11:48) - Folks on social media apps will show their highlight reel. They'll show the success that they're having in the moment, but they're not showing how long it took to get there. The quote unquote overnight successes aren't showing the 510, however many years it took to get there. And these overnight successes did not happen overnight. Um, it started at a point, however many months, likely years back, when that person decided that they were going to do this and they were going to move forward towards this goal, no matter how little they did each day, because it is better to make a 1% or one degree increments of progress than to stay at zero or even go the other way. Go the opposite way. When we are cultivating habits, it's easy to dismiss one day or one skipped workout or a one bad meal. Um, we were like, oh, you know, I've been good for the past week. I can, you know, just not work out today. I've been good for this past week.
Amaka (00:13:10) - Um, I've read every day. I don't have to read today. I don't have to write today. Um, I don't have to work out today, but those. Moments those days when you decide not to do what you're doing, when those days. Not that. Not saying that you don't need a break. Everyone needs a break. Balance is key. But in that really precarious time, when you're really trying to build momentum and implement something new into your everyday life. Missing. A time. Or day can be really crucial and can set you back, and the degree of setback can often be underestimated. Now I want to talk about another. Big point in the book that I am never going to forget. It's one of the biggest parts that had me think about habits differently before I read this book. I think myself and many other people potentially would think of habits in a linear fashion. Um, if I work out on Monday, I'll see results on Tuesday if I work out Tuesday, see more on Wednesday if I work out Wednesday, see more on Thursday.
Amaka (00:14:31) - And I'm just using working out as an example. That's what's coming to my head because I'm actively trying to make it a habit in my life. Um. We see habits and we want to see results. Proportional to the effort we're making on a daily basis. But that's not always going to be the case. With habits, you have to trust the process, and you have to trust that what you're doing today, what you're doing tomorrow, what you're doing the day after that is going to pay off in the long run. It's not it might not pay off the next day. It might not pay off the next week. It might not pay off the next month. But. Results from habits tend to happen on a curve. You'll start and you'll continue on, and you may not see any changes for a while. And that's essentially the curve having not really shot up yet. And it won't. It might not for a while, but the work that you're doing is not wasted. The hours and minutes that you were working out is not wasted.
Amaka (00:15:52) - The hours and minutes that you're reading, that you're writing, that you're learning another language, that you're practicing guitar, that you're swimming, whatever. Those minutes are not wasted. That effort is not being wasted just because you're not seeing the results right away. You get to a point where those efforts, though, feeling like it doesn't matter. Compound. And you wake up one day and you find that. You are starting to see the results of the effort you have been putting in for the past weeks, months, maybe years because sometimes it takes that long. And he gave an example in the book with using ice. So you have a block of ice and there is a particular temperature where ice stays ice. So let's say, you know, you have an environment that it's 25 degrees. So you have a block of ice. Nothing is happening to it. You dial up the temperature in the room to 26 degrees. You look at the ice. Is anything happening? No. You dial up the temperature to 27 degrees.
Amaka (00:17:05) - You look at the ice. Is anything happening? Has anything changed? No. You dial up the temperature to 28 degrees. Any change? No, 29 degrees. Any change? No. 30 degrees. No change. 31 degrees. No change. Seemingly all these small increments of the temperature are not affecting the ice. But then you hit 32 degrees. And how many degrees have we gone through? About seven at this point. Seems like that seven degrees didn't make much of a difference, but we hit 32 degrees and the ice starts to melt. So once we hit that 32 degrees, all the changes that have been happening up until that point, even though it didn't seem like anything was happening, we're all working towards that pivot point, that threshold, which is ultimately what we need to get to when we are performing habits and we are looking for results. At 32 degrees, that eye starts to melt and you continue. 33, 34, 35 it starts to melt faster, faster, faster until you have a puddle of water, but you can't get to 32 without passing through 31.
Amaka (00:18:26) - You can't get to 31. Without dialing up to 30, without dialing up to 29, 28 and so on. You have to pass through those stages where you feel like you're not doing anything, where you feel like your efforts are not going anywhere, where you feel like. You're wasting your time. You're not. You just have to keep in mind that what you're doing now, even though you're not seeing the results right away, ultimately, what you're doing is slowly dialing up the temperature, and then you get to a point where you have done so much work that there is no choice but to start seeing results. The thing is, though, when it comes to results. You can't really say when it's going to happen. You can't compare your journey to somebody else if they say, oh, I started to see results in a week. I started to get better at writing. Within a month, I started to see gains from working out within three weeks. You can't gauge someone else's timeline and adopt that as your own.
Amaka (00:19:44) - For the simple reason that you are not the same doesn't matter if you're siblings related strangers. Everyone's journey is different and your effort, your environment, your mindset when it comes to habits will affect how long it will take you to get to that threshold where the compounding just shoots up, which is essentially that curve kind of building. Slowly, slowly, slowly. It seems like nothing's happening, seems like nothing's happening. But you're continuing on. You're continuing on. And then before you know it, you shoots up, the effort shoots up, and you start to see the results. So I really liked that example and put it into pretty simple terms when it comes to the ice, kind of being able to understand what efforts and habits can do and why it might seem like nothing is happening, but you're essentially storing efforts and continuing to do it, continuing to store it. It's continuing to build, build, build, almost like, you know, um, uh, a kettle where the fire is slowly warming it up.
Amaka (00:20:59) - You know, the saying a watched pot doesn't I watched pot doesn't boil. So you are just doing what you need to do. You're turning on the heat. It seems like nothing's happening. But slowly, slowly, slowly, that heat is intensifying. And then the results become exponential. But the hard part is getting there. And he goes into really technical like strategies, practical strategies in the book, which I'm not really going to expound upon in this episode, because it's a really, um, exhaustive book. It has a lot of information about how to improve habits, um, continuing to perform habits in your everyday life. Um, but like I said, kind of just want to touch on the themes that hit me the most and I think are going to be the things that I remember and remind myself when, you know, I'm kind of in those trenches with whatever I'm trying to do, and I need some support. James. Claire has a name for that period of time where you are working, but you're not seeing results.
Amaka (00:22:15) - And I think knowing that it has a name kind of helps me, because sometimes you think, oh, this is only happening to me, I'm doing this, but nothing is coming about it. But reading it from like a more objective place in this book is going to help me when it comes to starting a habit and sustaining it. So he calls that period of effort, but no results, quote unquote, the valley of disappointment, which is an apt, which is an apt way to call it, because, um, yeah, you are essentially managing disappointment. You're doing this thing over and over, and you're not seeing the results that you want, and who knows how long it's going to take. You have to just keep going. So he calls it the valley of disappointment because we expect effort and progress to be linear. However, it's actually present as a curve, which I had previously described, where you see nothing for a period of time. And then seemingly out of nowhere, you start seeing results.
Amaka (00:23:24) - But it's not out of nowhere. The work you've been doing has only been stored. It was never wasted. So a strategy that I have put to practice when it comes to starting habits and keeping them up and keeping them going has been to be specific. And he also talks in the book about how vague commitments will not get you anywhere. If you say, I want to spend more time with my family, I want to practice the violin more. I want to run more, I want to read more. I want to write more. Like you're not going to do it. It's some elusive goal that you would like to do, but you have no plan. So essentially, what helps with starting a habit and sticking to it is specificity. Instead of saying, I want to spend more time with my family, you say, I'm going to make breakfast for my spouse and children every Sunday, and I'm going to devote three hours to them in the afternoon. Instead of saying, I want to work out more, you'll say, I'm going to work out three days a week Monday, Wednesday, Friday after work for 45 minutes before I go home.
Amaka (00:24:50) - Instead of saying I want to meditate more or I want to read more, you'll say, when I wake up at 7 a.m. before I get out of bed, I'm going to meditate for ten minutes, or I'm going to read for 20 minutes. So the vague commitment is now broken down into specific, digestible, tangible action points. And he talks about how specificity. The more specific your goals are, the more likely you're going to stick to them, because it's not like you're saying, oh, I want to, um, meditate more, but you kind of give yourself an excuse not to really do it because there's no plan there. But if you tell yourself, I'm going to meditate every morning for ten minutes before I get out of bed at 7 a.m., there's a plan there. You can't say you don't know how you're going to do it. You can't use the excuse, oh, I don't even know how I'm going to do this to kind of weasel your way out of the commitment. Now you have a broken down plan.
Amaka (00:26:04) - You have specifics to the plan you have when you're going to do it. You have where you're going to do it. You have how long you're going to do it. So you can't really say you don't know how you're going to do this. And because of that, there's a degree of self accountability that kicks in because now if you don't do it, you really have nothing else to blame but yourself. You can't blame your schedule. You can't blame distractions. You can't blame work. Because now you have set this goal and tried to start this habit in a way that there are specific components to it. So you are more likely now to wake up and sit up and meditate. You know, you're more likely now to get out of work and go to the gym and get those 45 minutes in, because now there's a plan in place and you can't say you don't know how to do what you're going to do. So that's something that has helped me for years. You know, I try and shy away from saying, oh, I want to do this more.
Amaka (00:27:13) - Or if I say that I know that I'm truly not ready to do it, you know? But maybe I'm just trying to bring that thought, bring that idea to the forefront of my mind until I'm ready to actually put a plan in place. So that's helpful, and I hope that that might help someone who's listening. If you have something that you've been wanting to do for a while, but you haven't set specific strategies about when you're going to do it, about where you're going to do it, about how long you're going to do it. Try and do that and see how that helps. Also, too, when it comes to habits, if you are trying to start a habit or sustain a habit that is completely incongruent with your day to day life, you're less likely to keep it up. You're essentially swimming against the current, and it doesn't mean that you can't do it, doesn't mean that it's impossible. But. The. The ability to sustain the habit will just be harder. So if you're saying you're going to wake up at 5 a.m. and run, but you're not a morning person, the chances of starting that habit and continuing it, or rather low.
Amaka (00:28:33) - But if you know that you kind of come alive in the evening time or afternoon time where there's a burst of energy that you get when you're, you know, at this point in the day. Then it might be easier to go running after work or go running before dinner or, you know, try and incorporate new habits and sustaining habits in a way that is already complimentary to your life. So in that way, you're not swimming against the currents of something that you typically wouldn't do or is incompatible with your personality. You're working with who you are, especially when you're first starting a habit. That's really important because initially, starting habits are about building consistency and momentum. It's less about perfection and more about consistency. So if you're trying to build consistency in a way that is incompatible with your schedule or your personality or your, um, family schedule, whatever, it's going to be harder to keep it up. That's just how it's going to be. But if you're able to incorporate these new habits in a way in your life that doesn't take too much effort or doesn't take you out of your way too much, then you're more likely to continue it on.
Amaka (00:30:00) - So, like with exercising, if you sign up at a gym, then it's on your way home. You're more likely to go there and get your workout in versus signing up at a gym that is half an hour across town, and you have to go the opposite way to go there, and it doubles your time to get home. After a week or two, you might putter out and you won't do it anymore. So that's another thing that I took from the book. Try and make habits. Work for you and incorporate them in and incorporate them into your life in a way that is sustainable long term. He talks also to you about quote unquote defining decisions. We make countless amount of decisions on a daily basis, but few of those decisions are what were called defining decisions. So you wake up and you come downstairs and you're deciding what to eat for breakfast. You could eat. Fruit and yogurt or make a green smoothie. Or you could fry up some bacon and sausages. You can order some donuts and you would continue on with your day.
Amaka (00:31:23) - Some people may not think that those choices are significant, but they actually are. Choices like that are kind of like the fork in the road. If you go the route of the fruit and the green smoothie, you're more likely to continue choosing making decisions in that vein for the rest of the day. You're more likely to consider maybe biking to work versus taking the car. You're more likely to go to the gym after work instead of coming straight home. You're more likely to do things that are consistent with the identity you're trying to make yourself. Um, and you with that, with those defining decisions, you're taking the the steps toward that direction that you want to go. But if you go the other way, then you're, you know, with the frying up the bacon and the sausage and, and ordering the donuts, you're more likely to drive to work, you're more likely you're more likely to get an unhealthy lunch. You're more likely to make decisions that aren't consistent with the life you're trying to lead and the identity you're trying to espouse.
Amaka (00:32:36) - So that's something that came to mind too. You know, after having read this book, I think about things. I'm trying to be a little bit more aware in that way. You know what? I'm starting my day and, you know, I'm having breakfast. What am I what am I eating? Um, if I have a little bit more time in the morning than usual, perhaps I wake up earlier than usual. What do I want to do with that time? Do I want to scroll social media, or do I want to get a quick workout in? And I have found that those seemingly insignificant decisions that are made in the morning time really, really affect how the rest of the day goes. When I the talking from a personal place, when I wake up and I meditate, my day goes significantly better. I don't know if it's, you know, the calming of the nervous system and the activation of the parasympathetic. Whatever it is, my day goes better. I am less stressed when I start my day with meditation versus not not saying that the days where I don't are a complete show.
Amaka (00:33:51) - That's not really all. That's technically that's usually not the case, but I get an added benefit to however my day would have gone when I meditate and I make better decisions for my health and for myself mentally, physically and otherwise. When that happens, when I start my day with social media, or I wake up and my phone is in arm's reach and I, like unconsciously pick it up and start checking mail or scrolling or whatever. Not that my day will go bad, but it won't be the best day. The potential for that day goes down. Not that it would have been a horrible day, but it's not the best day that it could have been. Um, and I have found personally for me that this really applies how you start your day is important, and if you have good habits that you are able to kind of implement once you're waking up, it sets the course for you for that day, even if you kind of slip up with a couple of things here and there, it won't completely derail you.
Amaka (00:34:56) - And if you're able to continue that consistently over and over and over, over time, you will see how your life has just completely improved, even if it's 10%, even if it's 1520. Not to talk of more, which is possible. So those defining decisions on a daily basis, even though they might be dismissed, oh, it's not a big deal. They actually hold more significance than you may think. So if I were to pick a chapter in this book, that was the most impactful for me, I would say it was chapter 11, which is titled Walk Slowly but Never Backward. And I think I mentioned this really quickly on this episode already, even if it's 1% of improvement a day, even if it's half a percent of improvement a day, it is better than zero and it is better than going in the opposite direction. Slow progress is always better than no progress, no matter how slow. It's always better than no progress, and it's always better than going in the right direction. And what matters is action.
Amaka (00:36:14) - And if you're making mistakes, it's okay as long as you're learning from them. Because it's proof that you're trying. What is most important when starting a habit and trying to sustain it is not perfection. It's repetition. It's consistency. It's starting and continuing. It's almost like trying to build a car while you're driving it. You know, as long as you're moving in the right direction, you might make you might make mistakes. But as long as you're learning from them and you're applying what you're learning, you're going to continuously improve. And as long as you're not scared to do that, you will make progress and you will see changes. So I'm going to read an excerpt from chapter 11. On the first day of class. Jerry Ullman, a professor at the University of Florida, divided his film photography students into two groups. Everyone on the left side of the classroom, he explained, would be in the quantity group. They would be graded solely on the amount of work they produced. On the final day of class, he would tally the number of photos submitted by each patient.
Amaka (00:37:24) - 100 photos would rate an A, 90 photos, a B, 80 photos a C and on. Meanwhile, everyone on the right side of the room would be in the quality group. They would be graded only on the excellence of their work. They would not only need to produce one photo during the semester to get an A, it had to be a nearly perfect image. This is where I started to underline at the end of the term. He was surprised to find that all the best photos were produced in the quantity group. During the semester, these students were busy taking photos, experimenting with composition and lighting, testing out various methods in the dark room, and learning from their mistakes. In the process of creating hundreds of photos, they hone their skills. Meanwhile, the quality group sat around speculating about perfection. In the end, they had little to show for their efforts other than unverified theories and one mediocre photo, it is easy to get bogged down trying to find the optimal plan for change. The fastest way to lose weight.
Amaka (00:38:31) - The best program to build muscle. The perfect idea for a side hustle. We are so focused on figuring out the best approach that we never get around to taking action. As Voltaire once wrote, the best is the enemy of the good. I refer to this as the difference between being in motion and taking action. The two ideas sound similar, but they are not the same. When you're in motion, you're planning and strategizing and learning. Those are all good things, but they don't produce the results. Action, on the other hand, is the type of behavior that will deliver an outcome. If I outline 20 ideas for articles I want to write, that's motion. If I actually sit down and write an article, that's action. If I search for a better diet plan and read a few books on the topic, that's motion. If I actually eat a healthy meal, that's action. Sometimes motion is useful, but it will never produce an outcome by itself. It doesn't matter how many times you go to talk to the personal trainer, that motion will never get you in shape.
Amaka (00:39:37) - Only the action of working out will get the result you're looking to achieve. If motion doesn't lead to results, why do we do it? Sometimes we do it because we actually need to plan or learn more. But more often than not, we do it because motion allows us to feel like we're making progress without running the risk of failure. This paragraph hit me like a ton of bricks. Let me continue. Most of us are experts at avoiding criticism. It doesn't feel good or to fail or be judged publicly. So we tend to avoid situations where there might where that might happen. And that's the biggest reason why you slip into motion rather than taking action. You want to delay failure. It's easy to be in motion and convince yourself that you're still making progress. You think? I've got conversations going with four potential clients right now. This is good. We're moving in the right direction. Or I brainstorm some ideas for that book I want to write. This is coming together. Motion makes you feel like you're getting things done, but really you're just preparing to get something done.
Amaka (00:40:46) - When preparation becomes a form of procrastination, you need to change something you don't want to merely be planning. You want to be practicing. Practicing is key. Less preparing, more practicing. If you want to master a habit, the key is to start with repetition, not perfection. You don't need to map out every feature of a new habit, you just need to practice it. This is the first takeaway of the third law. You need to get your reps in. And in the little margins I wrote. Repetition is key, not perfection. You got to get started and you got to keep going. And you gotta make changes along the way. As you're making mistakes and you're improving, you're going to progress as you keep going. But the important thing is you have to keep going. You have to keep going, and you can't be afraid of failure. So that was big for me. That was like huge. Aha. Light bulb for me because it applies it applies to me. And I think that it might apply to some people that are listening.
Amaka (00:41:52) - So. I wanted to read that. Um, and I also mentioned that based on the book and what I read, that habits are based on frequency, not time, because James Claire would. James Claire talked in the book about how people would ask him, how long does it take to start a habit and sustain it? And he wrote that it's not about how long it takes you, it's about how many times you do it. So I'm going to read another excerpt. One of the most common questions I hear is how long does it take to build a new habit? But what people really should be asking is how many does it take to form a new habit? That is, how many repetitions are required to make a habit automatic. There is nothing magical about time passing with regard to habit formation. It doesn't matter if it's been 21 days or 30 days or 300 days. What matters is the rate at which you perform the behavior. You could do something twice in 30 days or 200 times. It's the frequency that makes the difference.
Amaka (00:43:01) - Your current habits have been internalized over the course of hundreds, if not thousands of repetitions. So think about what you do now. On your day to day life. Things that you do that you don't even really think about anymore. It's become part of you. Your brain doesn't need to exert any energy to get those things done. Those are habits that you have formalized over hundreds and thousands of times. So when it comes to formulating a new habit, it's not about the time it's taking. It's about how often you do it. I'm going to continue reading. You could do something twice in 30 days or 200 times. It's the frequency that makes the difference. Your current habits have been internalized over the course of hundreds, if not thousands of repetitions. New habits require the same level of frequency. You need to string together enough successful attempts until the behavior is firmly embedded in your mind and you cross the habit line. So that was big for me too. The difference between preparation and action, and the fact that sometimes we conflate preparation and action.
Amaka (00:44:16) - Meanwhile, we're actually not making progress. We are preparing to make progress, but we think that we're actually doing something when we're not. And time doesn't really have much to do with habit formation. It's more about how often you do it because the time is going to pass anyway. If you do something twice in a year versus. 500 times in a year, you're going to be more likely to see the results of a habit and have it become part of your daily life, to the point where you don't even really think about it anymore, versus someone who did it sparingly and is still struggling. So one of the final points I want to make on this episode is something he talked about in the book, um, about the two minute rule. And this is really helpful when you're starting a new habit and you're trying to build up momentum and consistency. It's really important to start small. If you bite off more than you can chew. You're less likely to start it and continue it. But if you take manageable steps forward, if you commit to changes that you know you can sustain.
Amaka (00:45:37) - You're more likely to build the consistency and the momentum and get to the point where you can add more and make it more complex for yourself. In the beginning, it's not about mastering complexity, it's about mastering frequency and repetition. So I'm going to read another excerpt on the two minute rule. Even when you know you should start small, it's easy to start too big when you dream about making a change. Excitement inevitably takes over and you end up trying to do too much too soon. The most effective way I know to counteract this tendency is to use the two minute rule, which states, when you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do. You'll find that nearly any habit can be scaled down into a two minute version. Read before bed at night becomes read one page, do 30 minutes of yoga becomes take out my yoga mat. Study for class becomes open my notes fold, the laundry becomes fold. One pair of socks run three miles becomes time. My running shoes.
Amaka (00:46:46) - The idea is to make your habits as easy as possible to start. Anyone can meditate for one minute, read one page, put one item of clothing away. And as we have just discussed, this is a powerful strategy because once you've started doing the right thing, it's much easier to continue doing it. A new habit should not feel like a challenge. The actions that follow can be challenging, but the first two minutes should be easy. What you want is a gateway habit that naturally leads you down a more productive path. People often think it's weird to get hyped about reading one page or meditating for one minute, or making one sales call, but the point is not to do one thing. The point is to master the habit of showing up. The truth is, a habit must be established before it can be improved. If you can't learn the basic skill of showing up, then you have little hope of mastering the finer details. Instead of trying to engineer a perfect habit from the start. Do the easy thing on a more consistent basis.
Amaka (00:47:49) - You have to standardize before you can optimize. The excerpt continues. Strategies like this work for reason two. They reinforce the identity you want to build. If you show up at the gym five days in a row, even if it's just for two minutes, you are casting votes for your new identity. You're not worried about getting in shape. You're focused on becoming the type of person who doesn't miss workouts. You're taking the smallest action that confirms the type of person you want to be. We rarely think about change this way because everyone is consumed by the end goal. But one pushup is better than not exercising. One minute of guitar practice is better than none at all. One minute of reading is better than never picking up a book. It's better to do less than you hope than to do nothing at all. I really wanted to read those excerpts because even though I've been explaining, you know what I took away from the book on this episode, I felt like hitting the point home wouldn't have been as impactful, or hitting the point home would be most impactful if I just read it directly from the book.
Amaka (00:48:59) - And those. I feel like those few excerpts that I read were the most important to me. The fact that it's not about how much time it takes, but how often you do it. It's not about, well, preparation is important, but it's not about. Procrastinating with preparation to the point that you're avoiding actually doing the work. And it's about making progress, no matter how slow. As long as you're doing something, even if it's less than what you have would have liked, it's better than nothing. And doing something, no matter how small, like he said, continues to cast votes for the person you want to be. It continues to propel you in the direction of the identity that you want to espouse. So all in all, what I recommend this book. Yes, I would. I touched mostly on the themes. In the book. That's. I know are going to stay with me. For a long time, and they have really changed the way I think of habits, and they have helped me reframe my expectations when it comes to.
Amaka (00:50:27) - Expecting success or results or change in a particular time frame. Truth is, I don't know when it's going to happen, but the important part is continuing the work. You know, getting down to the nitty gritty, doing the work that needs to be done. And we know what we need to do. You know, we can be fearful or scared to do it. We can procrastinate with, you know, doing all the seemingly quote unquote important preparatory things. But we know what we need to do to get the results. We are just concerned about how long it'll take. We're concerned about what people may think. We're concerned about whether we will fail or not. If we're able to quiet all that and focus and keep. Ideas like this in mind that he talks about. I think it sets us up. For more success. Um, I would also recommend this book because he gives a lot of practical tools. Um, I talked about one about being specific about your goals, you know, time, place, um, duration.
Amaka (00:51:41) - But he talks about a lot more in how to really, um, approach habit formation and sustenance in a long term way. So I would, um, recommend reading this book or listening to it if you really want to get down to the nitty gritty of habit formation in that way. Um, but like I said, I don't want this episode to be too long. I'm closing in on an hour of recording, so I really just wanted to hit the overarching themes that I know made an impact on me, and I hope that someone out there listening will, um, feel the impact of as well.
Amaka (00:52:27) - So with that, I'm going to end this episode. I want to thank you guys so much for listening. As always. I really appreciate everyone who turns on my episodes and spends time and spends time with me and listens and comes back forever in a day. I'm so thankful for you guys. Um, if you want to reach out to me, please do send me an email at BT bw podcast at gmail.com.
Amaka (00:52:55) - Again, that's BT bw podcast at gmail.com. If this episode or past episodes have been positively impactful for you, please rate and review this podcast on Apple and Spotify. Please subscribe, please follow, please recommend. Please share with folks who you think might get something from this episode or past episodes. And again, thank you guys. Love you guys. Um, sending you all positive vibes. Love, light and positive energy and I'll talk to you guys soon. Be well. Bye.